Stop Bragging, Start Connecting:

8 Social Media Mistakes That Are Killing Your Real Estate Business

In Part 1 of this article, we broke down the conversation we had with real estate coach and industry veteran Brian Icenhower, who attributes a huge part of his success to his social media strategy.

In that post, we covered Brian's posting protocol, his engagement schedule, and his approach to turning social media connections into active CRM leads.

Today, we're going to cover the 8 big mistakes he believes are killing most agents' social media presence (and therefore, their ability to make this a profitable real estate channel).

“You’ve got to sacrifice your social profiles for your business,” he begins by saying. 

“And if you’re not willing to do that—if you’re half-in, half-out—you end up looking like a part-time agent. And that’s what kills business.”

With that in mind, let's get straight into it.

Mistake #1: Flex Culture

The first thing Brian tackles is the ever-present "flex" culture that we have in real estate. And yes, posting a selfie on a private jet might get you likes, but it won’t get you clients.

“We’ve got all these agents out there talking about passive income, jets, and luxury lifestyles—trying to get other agents to follow them." he says, "But that’s not consumer-centric. It’s agent-centric.”

These types of posts often come from agents trying to recruit for profit-sharing or revenue-share models. But the tradeoff is clear: while you may attract agents, you're alienating actual clients.

“The consumer has spoken,” Brian says. “They think agents make too much. And when we’re out there showing off all day, they want us to fail.”

The solution? Brag less about how much you’ve earned—and more about how much you help.

Mistake #2: Turning Your Feed into a Billboard

You’ve seen it before: a feed that’s nothing but new listings, open houses, and just sold graphics. It’s not only exhausting—it's ineffective.

“Think about it like this,” Brian says.

“If people don’t engage with your posts, Meta’s algorithm decides not to show them your next post.”

So the more you post without engagement, the more invisible you become.

Instead, he recommends the 3:1 formula—three personal posts for every one real estate-related one. The personal posts aren’t about spilling your life story—they’re about connection.

“Get vulnerable,” he advises.

“Post about your family, your dog, your community. Do it in a polished, professional way. Then sneak in a real estate post now and then.”

Three posts to build engagement, one post to showcase your services. 

Mistake #3: Getting Political or Religious

In today’s culture war, it might feel tempting to take a stand online. But if you’re trying to build a business, keep your Facebook feed Switzerland.

“You’ve got to be very careful,” Brian warns. “Politics and religion will shrink your target market in half instantly.”

He’s not suggesting you hide your values—just be strategic.

“I’m a religious guy,” he shares, “but I don’t post about it. I want to work with Christians, Muslims, Jews—everyone. Why would I limit my business by alienating anyone?”

Follow this simple rule: If you wouldn’t put it on your website, don’t put it on your social feed.

Mistake #4: Not Engaging With Others

Content aside, one of the biggest mistakes agents make is using social media like a broadcast tower—only posting and never interacting.

“What the top agents are really doing is engaging with other people’s posts,” Brian explains. “That’s where the magic is.”

He teaches agents the 10-10-5 method:

·  Like 10 posts

·  Comment on 10 more

·  Then either reshare 5 posts or send 5 direct messages

This means your posts will start showing up in their feed more often. They'll search for your name more often (which again, increases the engagement and improves your reputation with the social algorithm), and you'll become the agent they think about. 

Trusted, and top of mind.

Mistake #5: Looking Too Busy to Care

During this /RealEstate episode, Brian shared a hilarious and cringeworthy analogy about a guy at his local farmers market who sells incredible hummus—but acts like you’re bothering him just by showing up.

“I don’t care how good his hummus is. He made me feel bad. I’ll never go back.”

The same goes for real estate agents. If your online persona screams “I’m too busy for you,” people won’t reach out.

“You look like that person at the counter who doesn’t want to deal with customers,” Brian says. “And people want that person to fail.”

Instead, you should come off warm, accessible, and open for business.

This ties perfectly with Mistake #1 about flex culture. Leads don't care how fancy your life is – in fact, it makes them angry – so humility and relatability is what you should be going for.

Mistake #6: Never Asking for Business

Now, there is a point when you can be too humble or passive.

A shocking number of agents spend years “building brand awareness” online but fear ever making a direct ask.

Brian calls this a failure of vulnerability.

“You’ve got to show that you want more business than you have,” he insists. “Say it. Show it. Ask for it.”

That might look like:

·  Sharing a success story and saying...

“If you or someone you know is looking to buy soon, I’d love to help.”

·  Posting a client photo with the caption...

“Grateful to help amazing people like this—who’s next?”

You don’t have to beg. But you do have to be open about what you do and who you help.

Mistake #7: Keeping Your Leads Trapped in Social Media

Let's say that you've built engagement and you’re connecting with people.
If you're not moving those contacts into your CRM, you might as well not be doing anything at all.

Brian suggests simple ways to bridge that gap:

“Hey, I’ve got something I want to send you—can I get your email address?”

“While I’ve got you, sometimes it's easier to chat via text. What's your phone number?”

You can do this through direct message, post comments, or sign-ups for client events. The key is to gently transition from digital to database.

Once they’re in your CRM, you can nurture them properly—with email drips, home anniversary notes, market updates, and more.

Mistake #8: Not Being the Local Connector

This is a ridiculously underutilized strategy in real estate. 

“Real estate agents are uniquely positioned to be the center of the referral web,” Brian explains.

Instead of just waiting for people to need a house, be the person they call for a plumber, a tree trimmer, or a dog groomer. Then follow up with a helpful message, like:

“Hey! I’ve got a guy who does great work. Want me to connect you?”

This is what top agents are doing. They've become the glue of their community. They're the connectors. The "fixer" guys/girls of the neighborhood. 

This builds trust, creates conversations, and makes you unforgettable.

“You’re not even pitching real estate—but you’re winning loyalty,” Brian says.

Final Thought: Want to Be the Local Celebrity? Act Like the Local Helper.

At the end of the day, social media isn’t about showcasing your success. It’s about demonstrating your value to others.

Brian sums it up best:

“Get out there and help people. Don’t just tell the world how amazing you are. Show them—with kindness, consistency, and connection.”

Be the opposite of the hummus guy. Be the person everyone loves to run into online—and the first one they think of when it’s time to buy or sell.

Looking for more?

Visit EisenhowerCoaching.com to learn more about Brian’s programs and training resources.